In the shades of early morning
I saw her beautifully smiling,
That moment i thought its a warning,
To save myself from falling,
- in love...
So I just kept on walking
She did notice me crossing,
I didnt know what she was thinking,
But I could see her all the time staring
- at Me...
Before i could go near her,
She was taken,
Taken from the place,
Gone with her are my dreams...
I went near, searched,
my eyes rolling all over the place,
Where? Where? is all i could hear inside me..
Scanned every nook and corner...
At last found her in the arms of a guy..!!
More muscular...
I was shocked...
Shattered to pieces...
To see her,
Being hit,
nailed,
screwed,
and finally hung.......
on a wall--- a painting of a Princess.. !!
LOVELY!!!!!!! you are getting better at this.
ReplyDeletebut why did you lose the rhyme after the first two. i liked the style-the one words at the end.
the last few lines totally sounded "sangam".
Great twist in the end!! ;)
good job bro.
holds the reader's attention till the end.
:)
You lik it?
ReplyDeleteWow.. I'm relieved.. Phew.. Thanks sis... :)
Ya i didn get rhythm as i thought to break it by having one word in each sentence.. And the one word thing in 1st 2 stanzas happened by accident.. Jus lik dat.. :)
hey guess the muscular beefy man would be none other than you! :P even in the portrait!
ReplyDeleteanyhow, nice theme and good try!
write more buddy
No No.. Maybe i'm big and beefy.. But Deepak knows to handle girls.. ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks a lot Reno..